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Breakfast With the Family (but way better than when you were a kid)

Remember when you were a little kid living with your parents? It was the worst. Sunday mornings for me meant that I got woken up at 7, dragged to church at 8, then breakfast at 10. The food was always good, but waking up early and going to church were always huge downers. And even worse, there were never any good records playing on any of those days.

So even though today isn't a Sunday, when my brother called me and said he had time to kill between classes, I decided we were gonna do the family breakfast the way it was meant to be done: no church, no parents, but plenty of good food and of course, great records.

My brother claimed to be somewhat of an expert on making scrambled eggs. Of course, any idiot can make scrambled eggs, but he did them up right. Add a little milk, and don't forget to raid your spice rack. We've learned a long time ago that every food tastes better with melted cheese on it, so we threw in some shredded mozz. This is why you didn't become vegan.

You can't just scramble a couple eggs and call it a meal, so while Matt took care of the eggs, I went to work on some homefries. Slice 'em up small so they get brown and crispy in the pan. Turn down the heat and toss in whatever you'd like. I threw in an onion for sweetness, a red pepper for spiciness, and a couple cloves of chopped garlic. If you aren't cooking with garlic, you really aren't cooking at all.

I'm not going to tell you how to make toast or slice up an apple, but you'll need to do both. Go to McDonald's if all you want are fat and empty carbs, I want a well rounded breakfast, with whole grains where available. Everything turned out really well. The eggs were fluffy without being too wet. The homefries were crispy with a nice kick from the red pepper. The toast was, well, it was just toast.

This breakfast was every bit as good as any breakfast I've ever eaten with my family on a Sunday morning in the early 90's, but they never played any bands that Greg Oblivian produced. My brother and I had a good looking breakfast in front of us, and we needed something easy going to listen to. I put on the Deadly Snakes second effort I'm Not Your Soldier Anymore. I know how great Porcella is, but let's not forget that that isn't their only record. They've released some hot ones before they ever put out that classic, and I'm Not Your Soldier Anymore is definetly one of them. This record is a rock n roller, but still mellow enough that you can eat breakfast and talk about life. You guys already know that the Reigning Sound does a great version of "West Texas Sound", but so do the Deadly Snakes. So if you've only recently gotten into the Deadly Snakes by hearing Porcella, check out some of their older stuff, you won't be disappointed.

After you've given this record a few listens, make sure that you take care of your younger siblings. Its okay to tell your parents to slag off, but you've gotta help out your brothers and sisters. If you aren't gonna clue them in on how to eat good food, or corrupt them with rock n roll, or tell them how to get chicks, who's gonna?

Posted by
- ,John

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Anonymous Anonymous said...


4:30 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


4:30 PM  
Anonymous Vanessa said...

I would eat the fuck out of those homefries.

p.s. yr brother is hot.

6:03 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

not dumb. post more!

1:09 PM  

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